Vanilla and Paprika Pig’s Head

“She’s dead. Wrapped in plastic.” I kissed Laura Palmer on the snout and started rubbing her down. She was from Berkshire, killed that morning, I estimated, and still had bright, sparkling eyes and a hint of blue lipstick across her lower mandible. Thanks to the National Pork Board, I watched her swift dissection, photographed it in Hall’s Market, and went home to cook my prize, a twenty-pound head labeled ‘dinner.’ The remaining 140lbs. fit in my freezer, which now contains pork, beer, and hot sauce, thus making me the most amazing date on the planet.DSC_9555 Continue reading “Vanilla and Paprika Pig’s Head”

Juicy Fruit-Infused Strawberry Cucumber Coolers

I participated in this campaign on behalf of Collective Bias and its advertiser and was compensated for writing this post. Seriously, if I don’t do these, I literally will not get home, or be able to buy that set of headless dog speakers I’ve had my eyes on. 

Arkansas is hot. Yes, the Northerner likes to complain. But I’ve been experiencing a weird dissonance when I waltz out of my temperature-controlled, 50-degree hotel room, into a 70-degree hotel, outside to a steamy, humid 90-degrees. Suffice to say, I’ve decided to institute a new workplace attire, ‘undershirt formal.’ And they call this a mild summer! In any case, I’ve needed to cool off and I’ve found that there’s no better way to beat the heat than eating chilled fruit and crying by the poolside. Juicy Fruit and I recently worked together to create cucumber and strawberry Juicy Fruit coolers, made with hollowed-out cukes so the cup and its filling is edible. How’s that for finding your #JuicyFruitFunSide?DSC_9096-2 Continue reading “Juicy Fruit-Infused Strawberry Cucumber Coolers”

#shop Beer-braised Jalapeno Sausage Sliders with Pimento Cheese

I am a member of the Collective Bias®  Social Fabric® Community.  This shop has been compensated as part of a social shopper amplification for Collective Bias and its advertiser. All of the proceeds from this will go to the Buying Flowers for my Girlfriend Fund, a for-profit organization on behalf of my girlfriend and also, me. DSC_8831 Continue reading “#shop Beer-braised Jalapeno Sausage Sliders with Pimento Cheese”

#shop Wild Boar Sausage Scampi with Roasted Garlic and Mozzarella

Disclosure: I am a member of the Collective Bias Social Fabric Community. While this shop has been compensated as part of a social shopper amplification for Collective Bias and its advertiser, the recipes and opinions are mine alone. The corny jokes, too.

In a world…where the dishwasher was full and the protagonist was incapable of washing dishes by hand…DSC_8678One skillet. Fed them both.

For.

Three.

Days. Continue reading “#shop Wild Boar Sausage Scampi with Roasted Garlic and Mozzarella”

Beer and Wasabi-Glazed Roast Chicken Sushi Rolls with Kirin Ichiban

Note: I participated in an Influencer Activation on behalf of Millennial Central for Kirin. I received product samples to facilitate my review as well as a SUSHI KIT!!! to thank me for my participation. 

Hear me out- I am a person who is the beneficiary of magic. Okay, maybe ambition. All right, maybe it’s just dumb luck. For whatever reason, good things happen to me and it’s freaking awesome. I receive fun and strange compliments on my outfits from strangers. Packages arrive at my door at random. Brooks Brothers gives me amazing discounts, though that could also be because I spend the average GNP’s worth of a small country at their online store. And this week, in the mail, I got a real, live sushi kit, complete with pickled ginger, rice, and a six-pack of beer.DSC_8655 Continue reading “Beer and Wasabi-Glazed Roast Chicken Sushi Rolls with Kirin Ichiban”

Chopped Pork with a Spicy Honey Nectarine Slaw

Summer is coming! Spring is here! I can wear shorts without feeling the need to amputate both of my legs! I mean, it’s not like it snowed on Monday and my car got stuck in the driveway or anything. Connecticut, you whack. With the lovely weather, I’m cooking up a storm and procrastinating on the gym when it ought to be the other way around. I recently started to desire eating meat again, so I roasted a pork butt and chopped it up for this spectacular sandwich.
DSC_8543 Continue reading “Chopped Pork with a Spicy Honey Nectarine Slaw”

Green Tea, Lemon, and Cacao Nib Banana Bread

I am a member of the Collective Bias® Social Fabric® Community. This shop has been compensated as part of a social shopper amplification for #CollectiveBias and its advertiser. Read on- it features delicious banana bread!

If you’re snowed in this weekend, why not try this twist on banana bread? It’s made with easy ingredients that I had while I was snowed in- bananas, cocoa nibs, lemon zest, and Bigelow Green Tea. While I brewed myself a cup of tea, I used a few extra bags to steep in a mixture of water and lemon juice for my recipe. It definitely gave the bread a unique, citrusy flavor from the matcha and lemon- and now that Bigelow has special bonus teabags included with each box, I can use them in my recipes and have a mug for myself. I picked these up at Walmart.DSC_8395The bread is made in a blender, which gives it a finer texture than most banana breads, almost like a fruit terrine. This version is gluten-free, but you could easily substitute regular flour as well. I added the cocoa nibs at the end. It made for a nice breakfast bread and snack after school, and would be fun to bring to a Saint Patrick’s Day party, maybe with a green matcha glaze on top? Bigelow is versatile for these recipes- it’s really #AmericasTea!

Continue reading “Green Tea, Lemon, and Cacao Nib Banana Bread”

Meyer Lemon Poppyseed and Gin Cheesecake

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Yes, like plenty of now-single heterosexuals last night, I, too, completely neglected to make plans, reservations, or recognition of love and affection on Valentine’s Day. An eleventh-hour search on OpenTable yielded a 1:30 reservation at the hottest pub in town and a mere three-hour wait at the local P.F. Chang’s. Thankfully, we remained vigilant and elbowed just enough star-crossed swingers at Whole Foods to snag a decent steak and a lobster tail for free. Along with a ridiculous cheesecake I made, wooed by the nonstick lubrication of my new Lékué springform pan, sent to me by the company. Continue reading “Meyer Lemon Poppyseed and Gin Cheesecake”

Date Night with Orange, Hothouse Cuke and Chickpea Salad #ad

Disclaimer: I am a member of the Collective Bias Social Fabric Community.  The shop has been compensated as part of a social shopper amplification for Collective Bias and its advertiser. Queers need love, too- if you need it, check out K-Y couples lubricant. Yes, this paid 1/4 of my rent. Warning! Descriptions of cute, queer dinner and relatively tame lovin’ underneath the covers ahead. Proceed at your own sexy risk…and have a happy V-day!DSC_8135What are you doing for Valentine’s Day? We’re planning by having a few date nights in advance of the big holiday. We’ve been doing a few of those lately, especially because I’ve been away on a few work trips for summer interviews. A few weeks ago, we gorged on $1 oysters at our favorite raw bar. Last week, we sprawled in front of a friend’s television to watch a marathon of our new guilty telepleasure, Cutthroat Kitchen. The premise is stupid. Alton Brown is inexplicably unlikable. We watched three hours of it. And tonight, we collaborated on a tasty vegetarian dinner and played with my new Rosle mandolin slicer and ended the night in a most delicious manner…read on to see what we did, and how I surprised my sweetie with some tasty treats.  Continue reading “Date Night with Orange, Hothouse Cuke and Chickpea Salad #ad”

Pierogie Mac and Kimcheez

Disclosure: I participated in an Influencer Activation on behalf of Millennial Central for Mrs. T’s. I received product samples to facilitate my review and a promotional item to thank me for participating.DSC_7623Quick! Wait! You don’t have to go grocery shopping. Step away from the shopping cart. It’s a madhouse in there. Lumbering people are fondling avocados and gabbing over corn chips. You don’t want to be there. I promise. I’m guessing you might even have the things you need in your own damned house. The best part? The two things you do need can easily be found at your local Asian grocery. This recipe is perfect and easy to whip up for your next party. I tested it out along with a few friends at my latest casual dinner party, and it went over with rave reviews. Continue reading “Pierogie Mac and Kimcheez”