Everyone these days is going green. Making the bottle caps on Poland Spring smaller and child proof so my little baby hands can’t open the bottle. Toting around colorful shopping bags to save plastic. A close confidante, Dr. Green, just bought her kid an eco-friendly, all natural bike with a penis. In some cases, they’re even changing the color of their logo to signify that they really, really do care.
Oh well. You win some, you lose some.
I’m doing my part for the environment by driving around in the winter with the windows open and the heat on. I regularly club baby seals and endangered animals, and I make a point of slapping hippies whenever I see one with a battered acoustic guitar trying to play “Freebird” and yap about Africa. However, I think that I make up for it by drinking Odwalla Superfood. I mean, look at it. It’s sludge green. It’s the greenest thing ever.The color itself is excruciatingly off-putting. In fact, it’s almost too green, like…say, toxic waste. But it smells innocuous, and it tastes really, really good. It’s also vegan. It’s a blend of different fruits, and I was really enthusiastic about trying it because all the fruits were fruits I love- banana, strawberries, apples, peaches, and more, and I knew that if I was five, I would have peed myself. All my favorites in one place.The drink itself was good, but wasn’t as carefully crafted as I might have liked. The flavors, though presented on the box, were muddled together and didn’t have the depth that I’d have liked to experience within the drink. It had a nice texture and flavor, with a little bit of acidity and bitterness from the extra vitamins and things, and it did provide me with energy, but for $3.79, I don’t see why I needed to spend so much for what was really just a green smoothie. Are you going green, readers?