Trader Joe’s Mini Milk Chocolate Peanut Butter Cups

He looked me square in the eye and said, “I bet you can’t eat just one handful.” And I looked vaguely in his direction and said, ” Yeah, sure, I’m sure they’re just great.” It was the best kind of a Mexican standoff, in the middle of a Trader Joe’s, organic, fair trade, child labor free pomelos rolling by like tumbleweeds, and I took the package from him.Trader Joe’s Mini Milk Chocolate Peanut Butter Cups.

Oh, you think you’re so cute. So tiny and bitty. Perfect to give to a child to serve at only the most haute of doll tea parties. Perfect for the burliest of porn star caliber men to pop in his mouth, a quick, protein laden energy boost with a sweet, sultry side. Perfect for the self-proclaimed motherly chocoholics.

You think you’re so perfect.
So I tried them. I brought them to Shutter Island and I tried them, and in the course of four days, they were gone. They are miniscule, and the chocolate is sweet. It carries a slight vanilla flavor, but that wavers in comparison to the veritable ocean of peanut butter that comes in when the chocolate melts. It’s just slightly salty, with a smooth texture.The melt is lovely, and the chocolate is chewy, but doesn’t get brittle or snappy. I wished that the peanut butter was a little saltier and grainier on the palate, as to provide a comparison, because after a while, the flavors just melted together. Reese’s does it quite well, with the peanut butter, but their chocolate doesn’t compare to Trader Joe’s. This one tastes more like a homemade peanut butter cup than anything else, but I loved them so.

Damn you, bitty monsters. Damn you to hell.

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